Count down: Less than five months.
We've booked the church and sent out the save the date. People have told us that we're cutting it too close. By now, we should've had everything set: reception, photographers, dress, etc.
Planning a wedding isn't fun. The thought of planning a party, buying a white, dreamy gown, and a beautiful pair of shoes to go with it, and going to a party with everyone you adore (and equally adores you)-- it's every girl's fantasy. Including me. But actually planning it, while having a full-time job and a lifestyle that you're trying hard to maintain (i.e. dinners and occasional late Saturday nights with friends, weekend vacations, shopping, etc.), something's gotta give. Obviously, I haven't been willing to surrender to the all-too-consuming life of a fiance planning her own wedding. I have yet to be convinced that one night is really all that worth it to give up six months of normalcy in my life, which I happen to like. Can I plan a wedding without turning into an overstressed maniac or is that a rite of passage?
Planning a wedding takes devotion, determination, and discipline. My life as it is takes as much devotion, determination, and discipline--and I already like it the way it is. But every time somebody asks me, "Have you found a dress yet?", and I give my customary shrug and say "Nope", the reaction I get is a look of disbelief, followed by a series of wedding related questions that if it were a test I'd have no chance of passing. And, it makes me question the direction Joe and I have agreed to take. Which direction is that, you ask? Plan a wedding but not at the expense of, #1. Driving ourselves crazy. #2. Giving up "normal".
It's not that I'm not excited. The way I see it, I live in New York City where there are thousands restaurants, hotels, caterers, and event places who would welcome a solid, expected income for one night. And I'm sure we can find more than a handful who can handle a party within a month's (or two) notice. Does it take six months to create a menu for one night? Does is take six months to order linens, table settings, and set up seating arrangements? So, what's with all this nervous rush that people keep telling me I should start having?
As for my dress, I wear a size 0 dress. I can buy it off a rack if I wanted to and have it taken in and hemmed by one of thousands of seamstresses in the city who would more than welcome my business. One of the advantages of living in New York City is the over abundance of service-oriented resources of all types available to everyone willing to pay. Am I going to run out of seamstresses, dressmakers, make-up artists by the time I'm ready to make these decisions? The logical answer would be, no. I say three to four months is more than enough time to find the "right" dress. As for everything else, is there really anything else other than a great party and a great dress to show up in?
Am I wrong? Should I be this calm? Or should I unlock the crazy, frantic bride from her cage and let her reign for the next five months?
